| Merry Christmas and Happy New Year |
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| 03:50pm 01/01/2006 |
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mood:  contemplative music: Th Pumpkins
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soo Christmas with mother was very nice, I got to meet Nathan's mother, my moms husband and she was interesting to say the least, and it scares me just a tad how much she and I are alike. I made a little friend while I was there, a bull that had a nnose ring like mine and little tuffs coming out of his ears that were so damn cute! Lou also came out there for Christmas, and it kills me how much she has grown up, she is so beautiful, and I can't help but be proud of who she is and the beautiful young lady she is becoming.
Spent New Years with my Barbara and Jamison, slipped into a party at the guitar house with some of my new friends here but we didn't stay to long as we much rather just preferred each other's company without the Chaos. It was a good new years evening, and it makes me rather happy that I gott o spend myfirst day of it with them, and even more days with Babs. but soon this vacation shall end as I have work rather soon. I will be the ASM for Romeo and Juliet down here in Columbus, but I know some of the actors and lve the show, so once again work is really just play yet i get paid. While the show is going on thought I have to make alot of plans and make alot of discsion as to my future... so I supose that is where the work really comes in... so here is to new days, new begining, and new decsions!
Happy new year folks...
and thank you babs for letting me use your computer! |
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| 12:28am 02/11/2005 |
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The Haunted One
You are the haunted beauty whose life is marred by
sadness. You are dreamy, delicate, gentle and
melancholy. As tragically beautiful as any
Shakespearean heroine, you possess a doe-eyed
fragility that is strangely enchanting.
What's so scary about you: There is something
rather unsettling about your fragile beauty.
You are like a dream that no one can grasp.
Your gemstone: Moonstone
Your Moon: Ice Moon (January)
Which Beautiful Vampiress are You? (For Girls! - Gothic Anime Pics!)
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| 12:14am 02/11/2005 |
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mood:  blank music: Fiona Apple
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untell what is told... life is a sewer! You get what you put into it... lets not pollute it anymore!!! |
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| I have nothing better to do |
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| 12:12am 02/11/2005 |
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mood:  blah music: Fiona Apple
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| Your Power Color Is Indigo | 
At Your Highest:
You are on a fast track to success - and others believe in you.
At Your Lowest:
You require a lot of attention and praise.
In Love:
You see people as how you want them to be, not as how they are.
How You're Attractive:
You're dramatic flair makes others see you as mysterious and romantic.
Your Eternal Question:
"Does This Work Into My Future Plans?" |
| Your Hair Should Be Orange | 
Expressive, deep, and one of a kind.
You pull off "weird" well - hardly anyone notices. |
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| 10:46am 01/08/2005 |
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- You Are The Key Character
"It's what I was meant to
do."
You are the true enigma. No one knows much about
you, you do not understand much of yourself,
and your life seems to carry no purpose. Yet
regardless of everything around you - everyone
knows that you are here for some reason, even
if no one yet knows what that is. Things seem
to simply fall into place for you. Almost as
though some force is working either through
you, for you, or around you. No matter your
troubles, you have been sent here to unlock
something. This is your destiny.
Which Classic Story Role Do You Play?
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| How do I??? |
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| 10:19am 01/08/2005 |
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mood:  discontent music: Crystalline examination by Louder Than Beautiful
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breath in
breath out
entry accessed...
soon to be denied.
wake up in mold, holding on to a brain you can't tame.
how do you hold onto yourself? how do you find yourself?
"I don't ever want to see her again" that stupid dream made me sick... I havn't remmebered a dream in so long and that was the one I had to remember. I am ready for this week to be over. I am tired of the same old shit. Let me grab your attention you... take your nerves and wrab them around your head into your mouth so when you speak it pains you just as much as me.
I apologize for the many I love to death but have not spoken with in a while.... it is still a journey I take, but it will end soon I hope.. and then I can give the attention you all deserve. |
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| who da thunk?! |
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| 03:51pm 16/06/2005 |
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mood: lazy music: The White Stripes
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Tim Freakin Burton!
NO WAY! You got 94 !!!!!!!!!! Ca RAY zy! |
| You freakin ROCK! Are you a ninja? It doesnt matter, congratulations. I'd shake your hand if I could. You know the movie right down to the last detail. You've probably also seen Edward Scissorhands, Beetlejuice, Big Fish, and other Tim Burton films because you just seem like that cool of a person. Keep rockin. |
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My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:
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You scored higher than 88% on Burtons |
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| and the rain won't stop... Here I stand in the rain |
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| 02:14pm 10/06/2005 |
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mood:  calm music: Bloc party
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here I sit synth dreads, and a new expression for a new day... alot has changed alot still lingers and to be honest I wouldn't change a thing. I miss people but hopefully they will forgive me for my need to get away. To many times have I been called a gypsy and now I think I may try and break it... I fought the urge a month ago and I am glad... it was all falling down.. raining.. things growing and changing... but sometimes I think we are suppose to just stand or maybe dance in the rain rather than run inside away from it. |
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| why do things go by so fast??? |
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| 11:30pm 09/04/2005 |
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mood:  sick music: Sniper Velocity *smiles*
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Alexis Catherine Grogan's Aliases
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Your movie star name: Truffles LC
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Your fashion designer name is Alexis Moscow
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Your socialite name is Pumpkin Berlin
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Your fly girl / guy name is A Gro
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Your detective name is Camels Lithia Springs
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Your barfly name is Sushi Screwdriver
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Your soap opera name is Catherine Starfire
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Your rock star name is Lik-a-stick Emu
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Your star wars name is Alepog Grotav
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Your punk rock band name is The Kinda Happy Tubing
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~*~*~*~*~UNIQUE~*~*~*~*~
You are different. You're the type of person that
is easily spotted in a crowd. You have a
radiant personality. You probably go through a
lot of mood swings from happy to lonely, angry
to sad, loving to spiteful, and so on. Be aware
that your sudden change in personality may
offend some people. People like to be around
you because you are genuine and relaxed. You
seem at peace with yourself and you give off
that "what you see is what you get"
vibe. That's a good thing because your general
audience will feel relaxed and at ease knowing
that they too can be themselves with out having
to worry. Try not to judge others on their
appearance. It's not nice. Over all you're a
spirited person who enjoys having a good time!
Good for you! :o)
Please Rate or message me! Thank you for taking my
quiz! XoXo <3 Lana
You're Beautiful...but why? ( PICS)
brought to you by Quizilla
after 6 hours of sitting in a chair I finally have synthetic dreads and oh what a happy gal I have been... did part of my phot shoot today... hehehehehe.. muy bueno... and we will do 2 more later on....
I got hit with the plague this weekend, sore itchy throat, runny nose.. bad headache.... but it seems to be withering away... lets hope anyway.
umm... maybe I will do a real entry later but for now I NEED A SHOWER!!! |
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| 10:54am 04/04/2005 |
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mood: indifferent music: Radio Head
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clean, take pogo on a lunch outing at the coffee shop, come home clean much more, maybe have dinner with the family, meet up with the new band see if we mesh, oh and I almost forgot kill Eddie... so that shall be my day, mixed in with hopefully more cleaning as the house is disgusting. |
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| *sighs* |
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| 02:14pm 01/04/2005 |
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mood: discontent music: The Dresden Dolls
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I shall be back to seeing Martha next week... I have much to update her with , as I already know she has much to say...
you know I keep hearing conflicting information, you yourslef should be first and foremost... Now I understnad that, but many of us look to helping others before ourselves and that makes some who they are, but then you get to the point where you have helped so many others you havn't even thought about yourself and there you are falling into a hole... now I am not applying this to anything in particular, but it does apply to an extent the whole not knowing where to draw the line. Finding a balance of taking care of yourself and others... not to be selfish but also to preserve yourself. I have watched many people in my life trying to master this skill and it seems to me that it is forever a work in progress.
Oh, I will just do this in my head today, I don't feel like having to watch everything I think by posting it on here. and that isn't because of you mrs lighting bug ears ;) |
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| Rainbows and missing the fairies |
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| 07:51am 30/03/2005 |
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mood:  sore music: Half Jack -Dresden Dolls
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Very Very Much
if you are missing someone and can't get them out of your head then repost this within one minute and that person will suprise you tomorrow.
...or so this chain shit leads you to believe...
IF YOU BREAK THIS YOU WILL HAVE THE WORST DAY OF YOUR LIFE TOMORROW!!!
I took a step back... after so many forward... I went to the hospital yesterday... When it rains it pours "and I always find myself wanting more"
Working the sound board for the ballet... getting paid $11/hour and you will hear no complaints from me. I miss Aileen's birthday.. because I was so oblivios of the dates, I owe her for that.. I owe a phone call to a few others...
*laughs* I can't believe I am up at this hour on a day off. pish posh take off my socks slip me in bed and I shall think of rainbows instead... |
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| anxiety |
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| 08:45am 25/03/2005 |
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mood: calm music: The Sounds
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I think I had an anxiety attack last night... what exactly do those consist of... I ought to look it up but if anyone just knows any information off the top of their heads let me know... it may have just been an off night for me. I think we all have thosewell off to work, finish finding neverland, and maybe go to band practice tonight, we shall see.. |
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| ever throw away $20? |
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| 12:22am 24/03/2005 |
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mood:  frustrated music: Manson
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alright... I have been avoiding writing in here to be honest... I took a trip to Atlanta this past weeknd enjoyed all of it except one part... I got to spend time with some great awesome friends and played Anne Frank and feared well reactions and drama I guess.. I still got dramam from one end of the trip though, as I didn't get to spend really anyone time with one of the main few I went up to go and see, but that is alright... I still had a fabulous time the whole one night and morning I got to stay in Atlanta... So that was a huge highlight... and then I have work and was suppose to have band practice.. well we were all in the space, and there was practicing going on but you know what I will spare myself typing this due to the fact of how frustrated I am with this situation right now... so if curiosity has taken over believe me andrea got my vent the other, ask about a month or two away, maybe then.... Lets see Andrea and I found the PERFECT place for our store... so many huge windows, the absolute perfect location... needs alot of work, but I am soooooo excited... I know this is a huge embarkment, but I am more than thrilled and ready for the hard work. Oh, missed my photo shoot this weekend due to having to work but that is fine, we rescheduled it two weeks from now, which gives me time to find some more extentions to match what I have colored my hair, and then ofcourse add black but it will be perfect for my month so i can't complain, I just hope we can find the color, if not then we will just have to dye some. so for now this is as much as I am going to do as I need to get to bed... and the rest need not be typed at the moment.
adieu |
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| The Mars Volta |
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| 10:09pm 17/03/2005 |
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mood:  amused music: The MARS Volta
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APRIL 29TH The MarS Volta ladies and gentlemen... here is the song I hear on the radio... doesn't do justic to the rest of the albuk, they should just play the whole thing, but you know how radio stations are. check it out... I just stumbled across them from the band awe, and have really enjoyed it...
The Widow
He’s got fasting black lungs
Made of clove splintered shardes
They’re the kind that will talk
Through a weezing of coughs
And I hear him every night
In every pore
And every time he just makes me warm
Freeze without an answer
Free from all the shame
Must I hide
Cuz I’ll never never sleep alone
Look at how they flock to him
From an isle of open sores
He knows that the taste is such
Such to die for
And I hear him every night
On every street
The scales that do slither
Deliver me from…
Freeze without an answer
Free from all the shame
Then I’ll hide cuz i’ll never never sleep alone
Oh lord
Said I’m bloodshot for sure
Pale runs the ghost
Swollen on the shore
everynight
in every pore
The scales that do slither
Deliver me from…
Freeze without an answer
Free from all the shame
Then I’ll hide
Cuz I’ll never never sleep alone
http://www.themarsvolta.com/
oh, and I might so to school to do hair... its a thought... and I think it would be alot of fun... *laughs* and I got a really bad hair cut but all is good... |
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| scratch my itchy teeth |
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| 12:37am 16/03/2005 |
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mood: with myself music: Radio Head
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I can not see what tomorrow brings... I look up and down left and right and see nothing today.. nothing tonight... I am not mature... I am not responsible... but as I see it there are people out there twice my age that are even more so than myself... ofcourse other people don't matter, its me other people are concerned with... or I should be concerned with... I know already that I am not the best at traltionships.. I can't maintain them very well unless they are in front of me all the time, its like ADD but in relationships. Many people have caught the wrath of that... well as of recently I saw it coming, and well my family fianlly had the balls to say something to me I guess... it is kind of hard being put into place you know... I feel like a set of teeth sometimes... going through life in braces... held in by metal discomfort.. sometimes I go in for an adjustment and things feel alright, and other days I get the power chain and all night the teeth ache and ache... almost angry at the pain. all the metal there to keep you straight keep you in line... so finally one day you can have straight teeth... well I am not straight yet I suppose, still in braces... bracket by bracket... but you know, even people who get braces off still have to wear a retainer or maybe their teeth just screw up again... Some times the orthodontist doesn't even know when braces are suppose to come off so how are we as humans suppose to know.. well we don't.. we wheel around life going crazy and getting all out of whack sometimes... We all have so far to go, we all have so much to learn.. and we all need to appreciate more in our life... I am currently fighting a battle... the battle of wanting to really value and love and take care of the relationships I have or whether to push them away, I will admit sometimes pushing them away seems alot easier, but I know that isn't the right answer, even though some are going to get pushed away because I have to focus on others and myself before I can take on more. ( leena Rudi this does not mean you guys!) so today... scratch your itchy teeth, listen to the mars volta, smell a flower, look someone in the eye, and make sure you tell atleast one person how much you love them. Don't be desrtuctive, don't push away, don't run away... open arms are open for a reason... |
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| dog nightmares |
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| 12:22am 15/03/2005 |
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mood: contemplative music: The Cure
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I have a photo shoot this weekend for the Aids gothic calendar, Miss Feb. right here... I have to get out of working this weekend because I may be making a trip to atlanta this weekend... before I do that I have to fandangle getting a sheap oil change so my car will actually make it up there without falling apart, right? school is school... I may be quitting the Hot Topic job due to a few ummm unsatisfactory things. I really just need to get out of the house to be honest... which is funny because I am never home anyway, but that is aside from the point, isn't it? May have band practice tomorrow seeing as I may be gone Saturday night, hopefully gone anyway... maybe I can convince Leena and Rudi to come see a show with me that night. *pokes*
ohh enough of this for now |
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kitalia's journal
pissed off
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